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News :: Miscellaneous
Bush-Cheney Regime Dissolved Current rating: 0
10 May 2002
Modified: 11 May 2002
Fake "U.S. Administration" Found Guilty of Numerous Felonies. New Cabinet Nominated....
My Fellow Americans,

In times like these, there's no point in beating around the bush. Due to the fact that certain parties continually and unlawfully proclaiming themselves to be "the U.S. Administration" are guilty of numerous felonies*, I, Jonathan P. Chance, provisional President of the United States, hereby nominate the following citizens to serve the lawful United States Administration until genuine, manually counted, fair and open elections** are held in our nation:

Vice President - Woody Harrelson
Secretary of Agriculture - Jeremy Rifkin
Secretary of Commerce - Joseph Stieglitz
Secretary of Defense - Colin Powell
Secretary of Education - Arianna Huffington
Secretary of Energy - Denis Hayes
Secretary of Health and Human Services - Bernard Lietaer
Secretary of Housing and Urban Development - Jimmy Carter
Secretary of Labor - William Whyte
Secretary of State - Barbara Lee
Secretary of the Interior - Winona LaDuke
Secretary of the Treasury - Ron Paul
Secretary of Transportation - Paul Wellstone
Secretary of Veterans Affairs - John McCain
Attorney General - Ralph Nader
Chairman of the Federal Communications Commission - Jim Hightower
Chairman of the Federal Election Commission - Ronnie Dugger
Director of the Defense Intelligence Agency - Thomas Wilson
Director of the Drug Enforcement Agency - Brad Pitt
Director of the Environmental Protection Agency - Amory Lovins
Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation - Mike Ruppert
Director of the Federal Emergency Management Agency - Jesse Ventura
Director of the National Security Agency - James Bamford
National Security Advisor - Gary Sick
Press Secretary - Gore Vidal
Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms - DISSOLVED
Central Intelligence Agency - DISSOLVED
Federal Reserve Corporation - DISSOLVED
Internal Revenue Service - DISSOLVED

Meanwhile, all participants of the unlawful "U.S. Administration" are hereby ordered to surrender themselves to the Federal Bureau of Investigation or the United States Army.

Jonathan P. Chance
President of the United States

May 11, 2002

jpchance (at) egroups.com
http://egroups.com/group/jpchance
http://www.constitution.org

* The parties who continually and unlawfully proclaim themselves to be "the U.S. Administration", besides violating the most essential Articles and Amendments of the Constitution, also violate the following Codes, and thereby do not lawfully represent the citizens of the United States.

Title 18, Chapter 11, Section 201 (Bribery of public officials.)
Title 18, Chapter 11, Section 241 (Conspiracy against rights.)
Title 18, Chapter 13, Section 242 (Deprivation of rights under color of law.)
Title 18, Chapter 19, Section 373 (Solicitation to commit a crime of violence.)
Title 18, Chapter 50A, Section 1091 (Genocide.)
Title 18, Chapter 93, Section 1924 (Unauthorized removal and retention of classified documents or material.)
Title 18, Chapter 95, Section 1956 (Laundering of monetary instruments.)
Title 18, Chapter 95, Section 1957 (Engaging in monetary transactions in property derived from specified unlawful activity.)
Title 18, Chapter 113B (Terrorism.)
Title 18, Chapter 115, Section 2381 (Treason.)
Title 18, Chapter 115, Section 2384 (Seditious conspiracy.)
Title 18, Chapter 115, Section 2385 (Advocating overthrow of government.)

** Violations of fair election procedures are evidenced in the following documents:

http://notablesoftware.com/Press/Dugger1.html
http://www.fec.gov/pages/vendorslist.htm
http://gregpalast.com/detail.cfm?artid=84&row=1
http://conspire.com/vote-fraud.html
http://notablesoftware.com/evote.html
http://opensecrets.org
http://www4.law.cornell.edu/uscode/18/201.html
http://egroups.com/group/jpchance/links/Elections_000993420693
See also:
egroups.com/group/jpchance
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Comments

Who Elected You ? (and This Isn't News)
Current rating: 0
11 May 2002
Gosh John, did you get elected in one of those Florida elections? If so, it's really sad that we end up with another ringer, someone with even less credibility than the present pResident, you.

And you still end up appointing a war criminal from the present administration, Colin Powell, to be Defense Secretary, along with one of his fellow war criminals, John McCain, to be head of Veterans Affairs. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Put the ego away and try writing some news some time, if you really, really have to see your name up in lights BY SPAMMING EVERY FRIGGIN IMC.
He Got an F
Current rating: 0
11 May 2002
No doubt about it. Jon's grasp of history is no better than it ever was. I'm ashamed to say that I wasn't able to help him. Now look at the results.

His little list of who he'd like to help him if he could somehow seize power displays a discouraging amount of ignorance. Sure, some of the people on it are no-brainers for a more just and equitable United States. But ML is darn right about that Powell character. What were you thinking, Jon???
Spamming IMC Doesn't Work
Current rating: 0
11 May 2002
Just a few more observations on the habits of Mr. Chance.

Even with all the link-pimping for his Yahoo group on IMC the last few months, the damn thing only has 78 members, even less than the last time I looked. Most of it is ol' JP talking to himself, along with a few of his buddies (who could just as easily be aliases for JP himself.)

And it's mainly lamer than a stepped-on centipede. Get a life.

Face it guy, you're not winning any readers, or friends, by spamming the IMC network.